Every now and then your primary relationship (with your spouse,
partner, lover) needs a reality check to make sure you are both on the
same page and in touch with each other.
I've been reading many articles lately about men and women whose
spouses/partners have left them unexpectedly leaving them both
surprised and devastated.
Most of them had no inkling that the relationship was anything but
good. They saw no signs of trouble, unusual behavior, or what was to
come crashing down on them.
How does this happen?
Unfortunately it does happen, and it happens to couples that allow
themselves to fall into an unconscious routine.
They begin to take each other for granted, lose connection with
each other's thoughts and feelings and generally forget to do the
small, considerate things they used to do in the past. It happens more
often than anyone would care to admit.
Before the situation deteriorates to the point of no return, there
are some things you can do to make sure you and your partner are in
sync and working together.
Maintaining A Good Relationship:
other. Try to understand each other's
feelings and points of view. Don't try to change one
another now that you're in the relationships. You were
initially attracted to each other for a reason. Remember
what it was and continue to appreciate it.
Never underestimate the importance of good communication.
If something is going on inside of you, share it. Don't
keep your feelings, good or bad, to yourself. If you have
a problem let your partner in on it. Work on a solution
together. It will create intimacy and bring you closer
together. When something good happens to you at work or
you've achieved a goal, share that as well. All sharing
and exchanging of information brings people closer to each
other. Practice communicating with each other.
Do the little
things. Be considerate and thoughtful. If
you're getting yourself a coffee, apple or snack from the
kitchen ask your partner if he/she wants one too. When
your spouse is tired and sore give him/her a back rub or
massage. Be aware of each others needs.
caught up in the rat race. People get too
wrapped up in getting ahead and the mechanics of everyday
living. They rush around doing, getting, and not taking
time to live
in the moment. By not paying attention to each other
you can become disconnected with yourself and your
Maintain a Sense
of Humor. Laugh
together. Don't take things
too seriously. Barring a tragedy, nothing is so serious
that you can't step back and look at the humorous side. Laughter
is contagious and creates intimacy.
care of and respect yourself. As mentioned in Love
Yourself in order function fully, strive for balance.
If you don't take care of yourself, everything around
you will fall apart including your relationship.
a Life. Everyone needs a life of his/her own.
If you don't have one, you not only tend to invade
someone else's space, you probably become too dependent
and therefore less interesting.
One of the most important things you can bring to a
relationship is your unique set of qualities and a
Contrary to what you may think, maintaining your
individuality and having a life of your own strengthens a
relationship and keeps it fresh and interesting.
So before things start sliding or become
stagnant in your relationship, start developing some good maintenance
habits. Communicate, laugh, be independent, take care of yourself and
your relationship will not only survive, it will flourish.